When I was in my younger twenties, my life was full of passion. I was extremely into fitness and toned my body to the point I had guys in the gym, asking me for tips. I had recently found a church I felt I fit into and was energized by my new relationship with God. I followed my passion of fitness and became a personal trainer. I trained members at the YMCA, taught fitness classes and loved helping family and friends meet their fitness goals. I loved my life, even though I was struggling with paying off debts and figuring out how I was going to move out of my parents house. I figured out a way to go to college, I began working full time at a health center and slowly my passions gave away to fatigue. Between work and classes, I had no time for a social life, to work out in the gym or to follow other passions. Maybe there was time, but I was too tired to make the attempt. I was working full time, trying to juggle it all and burned myself out. I graduated from the University of Washington and life didn’t go exactly as planned. I continued working at the same job, making the same amount of money and in the same position as before. I felt extremely discouraged. But, I continued on, working hard, hoping for it all to pay off.
It did pay off eventually. I got a raise. I got my own office. I was able to work from home a day a week and get off early on Fridays. I decorated my desk with plants and decor that brought me peace and happiness while I worked. I was able to enjoy it for a short time, just before I found out the business was going to be sold. I went through weeks of stress and uncertainty. I had worked at my job for over fifteen years- just a young girl when I started. What would I do now? Who am I now? What kind of other passions would I follow?
I started thinking back, to the time when I had passions in my life. When I did things because I really wanted to. It didn’t matter if I was getting paid, I did things because they brought me joy. Back when life was care free. I looked back at the dreams from my youth.
I have really been looking at this whole being in debt/ rat race society America has been in and I don’t like it. I am wanting to take a different path than the norm. I have no desire to keep up with the Jones’s or to work forty plus hours a week- for someone else. I want more from life than that. I want more for myself. So, as I look back at what used to make me happy, I see the things that pull still at my heart strings. I still want to be fit and take care of my health. I still love to write. I still want to travel as much as possible. When I was younger, I had no desire to work long hours in an office, and I don’t still. There are passions inside of me still, I just have to dig them up. It has been awhile! I am determined to live a life that makes me the most happy and brings out the best in me. I refuse to continue to feel burned out from a lifestyle that doesn’t bring me the most happiness.