I haven’t been on here for a few weeks, mostly because I have been on the rollercoaster called, “Life” and I haven’t been able to get off of it. One thing after another has happened, bringing me feeling the highest highs and the lowest lows. Let me explain. Two weeks ago, I was in Vegas. It was a last minute trip with friends and it was filled with sunshine and laughs. Just laying by the pool relaxing, felt golden. I enjoyed every minute of it, especially since I have been trying to be frugal and simple, Vegas is neither and it was nice to take a break. Before I left, there was some work drama, and I found out some co-workers were talking bad about me. I suppose that is what happens sometimes when you are the manager, but I always try my best to be fair and caring, so it really hurt my feelings. I was able to let it go a little bit while being in Vegas, if any place is good at forgetting problems, I’d say Vegas is a good choice. When I got home, driving to pick up my dogs after leaving the airport, I received a phone call that my best friend, who was six months pregnant, had to be induced into labor and the baby didn’t make it. My heart ached for her and her husband and all the joy I felt in Vegas, came back to all the realities of real life back home. A few days later, I found out that my parents, who are having their dream home built, found out that their builder is going bankrupt, hasn’t been paying their sub-contractors and now they are sending liens to my parents against their property. Both their life savings and dream home are at stake and there is nothing that I can do about it. I am devastated for them. And just to top it off, both my dogs became allergic to flee bites they received at my parents house, resulting in a high vet bill and having to wear a cone. I think it is safe to say, life has been a little rough.
I have had a tough time to let it all go and just try to be positive. The whole week I feel as if I have been in a fog of sad emotions. I allowed myself to sleep in today, physically exhausted from it all. I started reading a book, “Primal Blueprint,” by Mark Sisson that not only talks about a healthy way to eat and exercise, but also balance life, the importance of sunshine and nature. I read for a few hours, getting excited about wanting to make some choices that will lead to a better lifestyle. I took my dogs out for a hike in the sunshine and when I got home I started to cook a healthy meal. Just the act of doing something good for myself, made me feel better. I realized, that life is going to be filled with sad things that I will have no control over, so it is best for me to take care of my physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual health, the best I can, so that I will be able to handle those hard situations. That is the hard part of being an empathetic person, is that you feel everyone else’s pain as well. It makes life hard and beautiful at the same time.
If anything, reading this new book and focusing on a different kind of lifestyle is a great distraction. One that is good for me too, better than wine or letting the sadness take over. My heart goes out to the people that I love, but the best thing that I can do, is make smart choices and if anything, I have learned a lot in the last week. I have also, once again, learned to just appreciate the simple things… like cooking dinner in the kitchen.